They're After Me Lucky Charms!
by BlueCrescentMoon999
Summary: [BK St. Patrick's Day fic!] Kalas and Lyude go on a leprechaun hunt! Complete randomness ensue! R&R please!


A/N: 'sweatdrop' Okay. I was going to post this on St. Patrick's Day, but my internet broke on Wednesday night. So… I'm here on Monday to post it now. T.T Sorry… And it's short. I know. I was all 'This'll be 10 pages!' but it turned out to be 4. I was in a rush to post this. 'sweatdrop' So anyways, here it goes!

Disclaimer: BlueCresentMoon999 Does not own Baten Kaitos or all related terms. Namco does. She doesn't own Lucky Charms, either. She's glad for that; she wouldn't want to.

Dedication: To Dinny. Why? She said if I updated my Christmas ficcy, I would be her god. I consider this an update! GODNESS NOW! w00t!

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Key:

"blah" – talking

I think that's it. XP

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They're After Me Lucky Charms!

Written by: BlueCresentMoon999 – 3/20/06

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All over Mira were small shamrocks. It was St. Patrick's Day! A holiday I don't know any thing about, except there's something about shamrocks in the middle of all the chaos. Chaos in shamrocks… What is this world coming to, now?

Mira was the oddball island out of all of them. What island better to have an over-population of shamrocks? Defiantly not Wazn. That's reserved for Grandparent's Day, or something. The whole island was green, including the sky, which brings me to some randomness at school. Some guy asked if Ireland was green. That's silly. Everyone knows, Ireland is tickle-me-pink. But in all seriousness, no, it's not all green. That would mean they have green people. Just like little people from the Wizard of Oz. …Or something like that. I haven't seen that movie in forever, so stop bugging me.

…I'm rambling now. Pardon me.

The only other thing I know about St. Patrick's Day, is I think there's something about leprechauns. If not, sue me; I don't care. I would just blame Kalas for everything. He would go to court, then jail. Paint the room red; I don't know. I can't read his mind. He's a game character, for crying out loud.

Back to Mira… Rainbows were all over, up above. That's wacky, because everyone knows what that means. There were pots of gold amidst.

So, now we get to the story. My incessant ranting has covered a whole page, that's enough of your valuable time wasted, now isn't it?

Two brave warriors headed out to the island of illusions. Why? They were pig-headed, that's why. Their mommies told them to stay home, but they were stubborn as a mule. I don't see how mules are stubborn. Probably because I've never seen a cross between whatever a mule's parents are… a horse and a donkey? Whatever. The two teen's names were Kalas and Lyude. They set out to hunt leprechauns, making a great topic for a story, considering how utterly stupid Kalas is. Not really. I just pictured him that way all the time. Silly rabbit; Trix are for kids! And now, I shut up.

Kalas marched confidently across the sea of green shamrocks. It confused him as to how 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 shamrocks could have grown in one night. It also astonished him how many zeros could be in a number. It made him go, "Holy fo-shizzle!"

Hearing him say that odd word, Lyude looked puzzled at his acquaintance. "…Bless you…? Maybe?"

"You're so stupid, Lyude. Haven't you ever heard of a word of shock? Such as 'Holy Cow!' But that sounds stupid. Whoever heard of a cow being holy?"

Lyude quickened his pace to keep up with the teen, who was walking faster with every step. "Well then, whoever heard of a fo-…shizzle… being holy?"

"Shut up, Lyude. You're annoying me. You wouldn't like me when I'm annoyed…" Kalas began to turn into the Incredible Hulk. Not really; but if he did, he would sure blend in with the scenery. Just for that, I'm going to make him dye his hair green.

The redhead stopped in his tracks. "Kalas! Do you hear that! It sounds like… like…-"

Kalas' eyes widened.

"HAIR-COLOR-CHANGING-ELVES-OF-DOOM!" The two teens cried out in frightful unison.

They stampeded away from the elves in mad sprints. Graceful as a deer! Quick as lightning! BUT NOT GRACEFUL OR QUICK ENOUGH! They got stomped on, providing a great mental image.

Out of nowhere, a beauty salon popped up. Scantily clad female elves walked into the room, seeing the chained up Kalas. Lyude panicked and hid behind his friend sitting in the chair of doom. "Well, gee, you're sure brave, Lyude!" Kalas sarcastically hinted back to the person huddling behind him.

Lyude let out squeaks of fear. The elves made their way over to Kalas, carrying fearful combs and spray things to change his hair color. The currently blue-haired teen tried to get out of the straight jacket that was on him, to no avail. The elves tackled him, Lyude jumping back in terror. "IT WASN'T ME!" He yelled and cowered in fear.

A few minutes later, the salon disappeared, leaving Kalas in shock, still in his straight jacket.

"AUGH!" Kalas screamed as he stared at a mirror that he pulled out of his hair. "My hair… my beautiful hair… It's… it's…"

The musician poked his head over to the other boy. "…Red?"

"YES! RED HAIR!" Kalas hollered to who knows who. "RED HAIR IS HIDEOUS!"

Lyude pulled out a bassoon and jabbed it around Kalas' head. "YOU AND YOUR PETTY INSULTS! I'm sick of you!"

"Mmhmhhahahamhamahmmm!" Kalas cried out. It seems he couldn't speak with that gargantuan bassoon muffling his speech.

Out of seemingly nowhere leapt out a certain green leprechaun. "Oh no! They're after me Lucky Charms!"

"OH MY GAWDS!" Lyude screamed, shocked at the sight of the midget in his view. "It's Lucky the leprechaun! WE MUST BE IN THE MAGICAL TELEVISION OF WONDERS!" He continued screaming mindlessly, while Kalas attempted to free his head from suffocation. "KALAS! WE MUST FOLLOW!"

He grabbed the mouthpiece to the bassoon and dragged Kalas along. Skipping merrily, he sang: "We're off to see the wizard! The wonderful wizard of Oz! Because, because, because of-"

"MYUPE! MHUT MUP!" It was a wonder that when Kalas tried kicking Lyude, he actually succeeded.

Meanwhile, Lucky was cackling whilst panting as he dashed off. "They'll never catch me! I have new hidden key marshmallows at my disposal!" He pulled out of his pocket, a handful of yellow blobs. Once they hit the ground, they created doors that stretched all over the island. "The only way they get me treasure, is to eat the whole door! WHAT A GENIUS I BE!"

Lucky would sure make a great friend for Mizuti. They both need grammar help.

The two teens eventually made their ways to the door. All along the way, they bickered and fought. Kalas had five black eyes; Lyude had twelve broken fingers. "Look! Cantaloupe!" Lyude exclaimed, pointing at the door. "It's so strawberry delicious!"

"WE MUST EAT THROUGH THE DOOR!" Kalas deducted, pulling out his salad spoon of doom. "EAT!"

Lyude had a better idea. He put his ear to the ground, listening intently. "The cabbage speaks to me. TELL ME HOW TO GET THROUGH!"

Out of nowhere, a flood of milk gushed past them. Kalas drowned. HA! Not really. This is getting to be a habit now. The milk did make him go crazy, though.

Kalas emerged from the milk, screaming bloody murder. "MY ARM! LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL ARM! WORSHIP MY ARM! IS IT NOT LOVELY? I LOVE MY ARM! IT'S SO SHINY! AND PRETTY! I LOVE MY ARM! WORSHIP IT! ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?" He stared at his arm.

"REINACTMENT OF WHEN HE WENT EVIL! EVIL KALAS!" Lyude took out his bassoon, using it to whack Kalas' head.

The bluehead hollered loudly in Lyude's ear. "MY ARM! MY ARM!" With that, he ripped his left arm off.

This is all scaring me right now, so I'll take a break. On the other side of the world, Great Mizuti was conversing with Lucky. "You say they be after your Lucky Charms?"

"Yes! They're after me Lucky Charms!"

She looked at him oddly. "You be sure they did not steal your marbles while they be at it?"

Lucky hissed at the magician. "No! My marbles are still in my head, thank ye very much!"

"Oh! HAHA! GREAT MIZUTI'S BE LO-O-O-O-O-O-ONG GONE!" She giggled, poking the leprechaun.

Ooooookay. That's scaring me, too.

With Lyude, Kalas was knocked out. That left him and Savyna to find the lost gold at the end of the pretty rainbow! Wait- Savyna was here?

"YOU BET I AM!" She punched the golden marshmallow door, breaking it to bits. "Aha! I'm the jelly donut, aren't I? Eh?" She elbowed Lyude, causing him to fall down.

Lyude conveniently fell, tripping into a handy little plothole. He was having a fun time twisting and turning in the slide it formed. "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Kalas woke up, drowsier the usual. "What happened? I feel like I ripped my arm off…" He looked down to see- "AUGH! Where'd my arm go! OOH! Plothole!" He leapt down into it, following Lyude.

"Oh noes!" Lyude blinked, flying out of the plothole. "Kalas is following me! LYUDE…AWAY!" He landed down onto a soft rainbow.

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" He wheee-ed as he slid down it.

Lucky was waiting at the other end. Why? I don't know. I guess I just felt like putting him there. "Ai! They're after me Lucky Charms!"

After much effort, the two teens managed to tie up Lucky, steal his Lucky Charms, and even grab some gold while they were at it. Lyude decided to buy Mira with his half. Not really his half, considering Kalas didn't get any gold at all. And that's the end of St. Patrick's day. Yes, it was short. Sue me. Not really. I'm broke now.

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A/N: Oooookay. That was random. R&R! You know you want to! No flames; they will be used to roast Geldoblame! MOOHAHA! 


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